Comments on: Taming a Sulking Filipina

By: Walther

Walther — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 15:28:50 +0000

“Matt” is totally right. If your wife is upset about something, she should simply discuss it with you. No need for either angry shouting nor the silence treatment. Just tell your husband what it is that is bothering you, because often he might not even have a clue he did or said something that offended you. An open conversation between adults, and no teenage sulking nonsense please. The guy will be able to either apologize and adjust his future behavior or (in case of some misunderstanding) explain the wife why he did or said something and what he really meant by it. But by punishing your husband by means of tantrum, sulking or some silence treatment, is just plain RUDE and serves no purpose in solving the problem. Don’t act like a 14 year old spoiled teenage brat, but like an adult and have an open, honest talk with your partner. Matt hits the nail on the head where he says that tampo is a passive aggressive strategy to control the husband. Don’t reward this kind of behavior or she’ll do it all the time! What to do then? Easy: give them the exact same silent treatment back and just do your thing like you don’t care. Just until she will come to her senses and tell what’s bothering her.

By: charisse

charisse — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 08:32:21 +0000

matt, it’s guys like you who makes life complicated by making simple and natural things like “tampo” trivial and problematic, when it’s not supposed to be. tampo is common among filipinas because we were taught that it’s better to cool off rather than yap our anger out with the risk of spitting out hateful words that we don’t really mean. and so fckin’ what if it’s a form of control?! women are supposed to have some emotional control on their husbands! many husbands lack the E.Q., and sometimes the best way is to let them feel it emotionally, NOT logically.

By: matt

matt — Thu, 26 May 2011 09:52:24 +0000

i suppose the answer to this tampo countering strategy is whether you want to be in a passive aggressive relationship or not. tampo is just a, culturally endorsed, manipulative, passive aggressive attempt to exert control. if you are willing to deal with this dysfunction go ahead- shower her with all the kisses and understanding you can. your reward will to encourage her to tampo you harder and longer the next time.

By: Heiko

Heiko — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 23:15:00 +0000

Hello Vienna! Thank you so much for this helpful texts. I’m reading now for more than one hour and I think I can understand my cute Angel a lot more now. Hope it’s not too late… Please continue writing, I’ll check back from time to time! Greetings from Germany!

By: Taming a Sulking Filipina Part 2 |Bizarre Marriage

Taming a Sulking Filipina Part 2 |Bizarre Marriage — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 06:09:53 +0000

[...] you haven’t yet, I advice you to read the first part before reading this [...]

By: Angelica

Angelica — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 03:06:14 +0000

yeah thats true.. but it also happens to men.. sometimes tis even harder to prod a man when he is the one being cranky.. unlike us, women, we easily give in,,,

By: Vienna

Vienna — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 03:05:27 +0000

hey danny,

thank you so much for reading my posts and commenting in them. i really appreciate it.

By: Danny

Danny — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 01:16:47 +0000

Haha, I really enjoy your replies. You are very witty and articulate. And I am also familiar with carino, warm affection. I don’t think I’m much of a hothead so that is not a problem, but I am a fixer so that was probably my downfall. Now I will anxiously await the cure to the major tampo.