Bizarre Marriage

Finally, you have accepted the fact that you need someone to make your life complete. You accepted the reality that you need someone to grow old with. And you accepted the truth that you are not getting any younger. The next step to do now is… to set a mission. Draw a personal mission statement that will fuel your personal undertaking with burning desire.

Yes, you have to psyche yourself up that you are ready to dig in. Set a goal. Have a clear objective of what you want to do. Draw your personal aspiration. Present your mission statement with solid conviction. Come up with a hard rationale why you want to go on online dating. And find a firm motivation to make you decisive.

When you have decided that you want to invest on a cyber relationship, you already have an idea on how your fairytale will achieve the happy-ever-after. Of course, we all want that happy ending. We all want our relationship to last forever. We all want the till-death-do-us-part become a reality. But relationship is a hard work. So you better set that goal. What do you want in a relationship? What can you sacrifice for a relationship? How do you sustain a relationship? Like any relationship, we always look for the positives. But we should also consider the fact that there are always two sides of the coin.

Wanting a relationship means you know the difference between wants and needs. Are you looking for love because you want it or you need it? Because eventually you may be asked – Do you want me because you need me or you need me because you want me? You have to be ready to answer that question and justify your answer. Notice that I have not mentioned the magic word – LOVE, yet. Because love is the aftermath of all the troubles that you will go through… if and when you will get lucky. Please note that not all will be successful in finding one-true-love in Online Dating. Online Dating is only one of the options.

In any relationship, love should be one’s goal. But in reality, I know this is not all so true. There are people who are seeking “love” [the most abused word in the dictionary] for personal convenience and there are lots of those in Online Dating. And everybody who engaged in this dating business is aware of that. There is nothing wrong if you are looking for love because you are afraid to grow old alone, you just wanted a future. There is nothing wrong if you are looking for love because you need someone to pay your bills, you are just being practical. There is nothing wrong if you are looking for love because you want to go abroad, you just want to fulfill your dream. There is nothing wrong if you need a father/mother for your kids, you just need someone to lean on. Whatever your reason is, it could be considered a shallow “mission” just yet. But that could be the start. What is wrong is, taking advantage of that person you found online, using him/her and damping him/her once you get what you want. You will be surprised that there are lots of people with the same agenda as yours. But still there is really such a thing as “love in cyber-nation”. Just be honest with your purpose. You don’t have to say it bluntly and right away the first meeting or you will shoo that person right away.

My hubby was already engaged to be married to another Pinay [annulled with two kids] when I met him online. He told me that very first meeting that his Filipina girlfriend just died and he was lonely and he wanted to meet someone again. He was so honest from the very first time. I told him too that I was in a relationship that time and that my French boyfriend who supposed to come to the Philippines to meet me turned out to be a liar. So I was honest too. Eventually, we became closer by just being friends at first. Me – giving him advise and consoling him from his loneliness and him – making me feel important, needed and wanted… we end up liking each other. And the rest is history.

“True love” is a reality. There are people who found it. There are people who are living it. There are people who are enjoying it. Two people can find true love and whatever selfish reason one may have will be erased by the magic of love or rather, one’s pure intention will be blessed with a real happy-ever-after. And this – should be your VISION. ©