I thought it would be easy

It’s a Sunday today and as usual my monumental laundry is already taking their sweet time in the washer and the dryer. I’m already done with my grocery errand and just had a sorbet for lunch. I am not feeling well today. I have not been feeling good lately… I feel nauseous in the morning… I feel like I want to throw up every now and then… and I am always cranky with a little burst of dramatic mood most of the time. I BETTER NOT BE PREGNANT!

Today, I finally got the chance to sit down and browse on my favorite websites. And this is one of them. I love this website. This website and I had a history way back when I was still new in this country (USA). This website served as my outlet to release stress and to keep my sanity intact.

Like Vienna, I am also in an interracial marriage. Vienna and I have common denominators that made us virtual sisters that we are, a relationship so special that even if we have not met each other in person, we have a certain bond that drew us closer, virtually of course. Why not? We both married foreigners. I met her when she was still in China and from then on she became my sounding board. I was a whiner and a cry baby and Vienna patiently listened to all my whining.

I constantly whine because I was once one of those women she described who has difficulty in adjusting to a foreign land. It was a difficult transition for me despite the fact that I was very much aware of what to expect in this country and from my then Fiancé. Before I come here, I was all prepared… emotionally, physically and spiritually. But then I guess I didn’t prepare well enough or I must say… the reality is different from my expectations.

I met my American husband online and got married. And just like any other interracial marriages, mine is no extra-ordinary. I thought it would be easy.

I had a better life in the Philippines… I don’t do many chores and spend more time in the spa having a body scrub than scrubbing floors. I don’t cook my meals and spend more time [and money] dining out or dining at a friend’s place. And I don’t even have to worry to get my well-manicured fingers dirty sweeping the floor or working in my garden because there is always someone who does the dirty work for me.

Coming here… I thought would be easy. I had to do chores and have never been in the spa since I came here. And yes, I scrub floors. I had to cook meals but hubby would treat me to a Chinese every Friday night. My fingernails are now short and un-manicured because I need to do the dishes… and help hubby rake the yard [fall], shovel snow [winter], weed the vegetable garden [spring], and gold pan [summer].

Living here… I thought would be easy. Oh well, I survived 4 seasons and I am used to Maine winter now. My life here is an endless struggle and unending discovery of new things that constantly fascinate me if not surprise me. Having a great life in the Philippines is indeed a blessing I will forever be thankful for. And living a different life here in Maine is a blessing that opened up my eyes to appreciate the best things I had, cherish them and forever be grateful.

I don’t say that I am disappointed with my life here. Maybe, I was more disappointed with myself for being such a baby. My husband did not promise me the moon and the stars when we first met and I had to admit he practically explained to me everything what I should expect from him. He was honest from the very start. He did not claim that he is a rich guy but a poor carpenter who just wanted to start a life with me and to grow old with.

Being in an interracial marriage was not that easy, I had to admit… but just what Vienna said… the love we have for each other made every struggle easier and worth-living for.

Tagged as: integration, intercultural marriage, intercultural relationship, interracial marriage, interracial relationship