Bizarre Marriage

September 2, 2008

Philippines on Divorce

Filed under: After the Wedding, Cultural Differences — Tags: , , , — Vienna @ 8:24 am

I know I have written about divorce in the Philippines in my other blog but I also have to write about it here specially because this blog is not only about intercultural relationships but this blog is also about married couples and marriage as a whole. Now, for those of you who don’t know yet, there is no divorce in the Philippines. Meaning Philippine citizens can only marry once until their partner dies or until their marriage is annulled.

There is a huge difference between annulment and divorce but in simple words, annulment can be defined as the process of proving that a marriage is not valid. Annulment needs deeper reasons and these reasons should be proven before an annulment is granted and once it’s granted, the two persons in an annulled marriage can marry other persons. Divorce, on the other hand is a legal act to dissolve a marriage and reasons for divorce can be anything. Is there annulment in the Philippines? Yes. Is it easy to get an annulment and can any couple apply for an annulment? No and no. Why? Well for annulment, you need a “valid” reason to begin with. Is your spouse gay? Is your spouse mentally crazy and you only learned about it after the marriage? Were you too young when you got married making you “psychologically incapacitate” at the time of your marriage (or vice versa)? These are just some of the accepted reasons but I tell you, there aren’t a lot. Reasons like home violence and infidelity are not accepted as grounds for annulment. And for people who like to get out of a failed marriage, they normally can just result to separation which can end marital problems but does not stop the marriage. Meaning, separated couples are still considered by the law as “married” and therefore they cannot remarry.

What if you are married to somebody who is not Filipino? What if you married outside the Philippines? Can you get divorced? The answer is a big fat NO. You see, when you get married to a foreign person in another country, you normally register your marriage to the nearest Philippine Embassy. You need to do this specially if you need to change your name in your Passport and because Philippine Law demands that you do. Once you register your marriage to the embassy, you’ll be regarded as “married” so no matter where you are, if you are a Filipino, you are still under and you are still expected to abide by the Philippine Law. Your foreign spouse can divorce you but you can’t divorce your foreign spouse. Why? Because your foreign spouse is not bound to the Philippine Law but you are. Your non-Filipino spouse can remarry but you can’t.

Many will dispute this but I personally agree that the proposed Divorce Bill in the Philippines should be approve immediately because I believe that there is no sanctity in an oppressive marriage and for a person who is in such deserve to get out from it should be given a chance to find quality marital relationship with another person.

March 13, 2008

Post Wedding Requirements

Filed under: After the Wedding, Wedding Documents — Tags: , , , , — Vienna @ 5:58 am

Everything worked out with our post wedding documents. We fulfilled all the requirements and now I have my E-card (Health Insurance) and my Aufenhaltstitel (Austrian equivalent to US Green Card). I am now allowed to enter and leave Austria as I pleased without the hassles of getting a VISA. With this, I am not only allowed to stay in Austria but I am allowed to work there as well. There is just this one more thing we need to do. In Austria, immigrants are required to complete an Austrian Integration Course. This is a 300 hours course that will run in three months. In this course, one has to learn how to speak, understand, and write German. There would be some lessons about Austrian culture, tradition, and maybe history. It’s a law in Austria that every immigrant should be able to integrate in their society.

I am perfectly okay with this but there is one problem. I have the allowance to complete this course within 24 months from the day the municipal hall gave me the voucher for it. By the way, this course is being paid by the government and after completing all the lessons, I should be able to pass some sort of a test otherwise I would have to repeat the whole course again in my own expense. Given that I can attend all the classes, I am confident to say that I am pretty much sure I can pass the examination but Marcus and I are not in Austria thus I won’t be able to attend the classes. Our only option (at the moment) is that I will go to Austria in the summer and stay there for three months to attend the course and Marcus will stay in China. This is not good. Marcus and I don’t like to be away from each other that long.

Documents Needed to Get Married

Filed under: Before the Wedding, Wedding Documents — Tags: , , , , — Vienna @ 5:53 am

Written on : October 30, 2007

This is for Filipinos (Pinays) who are planning to get marry in EU countries specifically, Austria. This is an extensive explanation about what documents you need in order to be able to get married to your European guy. Like I said, this is specifically about getting married to an Austrian but since EU countries have pretty much the same pre-marriage document requirements, those of you who are about to marry somebody from other EU countries can also refer to this.

Ok, so first things first. Do you have a passport? If not, go get one. Do you have a visa to go there already? If not, you have to worry about that first before you worry about pre-wedding documents but if it’s not a problem for you to go there and it’s just the wedding you have to think of then this guideline is for you.

Pre-wedding documents: these are the documents you need to have with you before you fly to Austria. I will explain later where you need them.

1. Birth Certificate: This should be from the NSO only and not the one from the Local Civil Registrar. After getting it from the NSO, you submit it to the DFA for authentication then afterwards, you should also submit this to the Austrian Embassy in Manila for verification.

2. Certificate of Singleness / Certificate of NO Marriage / CENOMAR: Like the Birth Certificate, it should be from the NSO only and it should follow the same steps.

3. NBI Clearance.

If you are in the Philippines, you can personally apply for these documents to the offices I mentioned. However, if you are outside the country you may authorize somebody to do it for you. The first two documents should be no problem; your authorized person only needs an authorization letter from you. Your NBI however, will be a bit more complicated. To apply for this, you should go to the nearest Philippine Embassy and tell them that you would like to apply for an NBI clearance. They will assist you. They will get your fingerprints and you ask you fill up an NBI clearance application form. After you have given them your standard passport photo and paid them some fee. They will notarize your NBI application form and give it to you. The next step would be to send this along with your authorization letter to the person you authorized in the Philippines.

Those are the first three documents you need and those are the guidelines on how to obtain them. Please note that it is important that these documents are not older than 6 months.

Let’s go to the next step. Say you are already in Austria. Before you can apply for a marriage license, you first need to report to the Philippine Embassy in Vienna. What will you do there? Apply for the Legal Capacity to Contract Marriage. What is this? This document basically says that nobody can stop you from getting married because you are legally capable to do it. What do you need to get this? You need to show the embassy your Birth Certificate and your CENOMAR plus a certain fee and you get your Legal Capacity to Contract Marriage. They will return your original Birth Certificate but they will keep your CENOMAR.

After that you can then go the Rathaus (Local Municipal Hall in Austria) and have your self registered. Tell them where you are currently staying at in Austria—register your address. What do you need for this? Nothing just the signature of the owner of the place you are staying at. If it’s your guy then it should be easy. They will then give you this document which says that you are registered with the police and that you are staying in the address you gave them.

With this document along with your Birth Certificate and your Legal Capacity to Contract Marriage, you can then proceed to apply for your Marriage License. Once they approve this (why will they not?), then you are ready to get married.

Where do you need your NBI? You will need this after you are married. If you want to be allowed to stay in Austria, you have to present your NBI and your Marriage Certificate before they will give you a residence permit.

That’s all. But before you surf away from this page, please note that I only mentioned the documents that you, as the Filipina, need. The required documents from your guy is of course another story. Also please note that I wrote this article based on my experience so please don’t take this as a legal advice.

Hope this article helps. Best wishes!

Getting Married in Europe

Filed under: Before the Wedding, Wedding Documents — Tags: , , , , , , — Vienna @ 5:48 am

Written on : August 20, 2007

So finally, you and your European partner decided to get married–a romantic wedding in an old historic place somewhere in Europe. Well I have not so much say on the topic unless your partner is an Austrian and you are a Filipina and you are planning to get married in Austria. I can warn you–it’s not easy! If you are planning on getting married there or anywhere for that matter, you have to go through several legal hoops. So be wise. Check the Austrian Embassy months before your targeted wedding day. A lot of people would prefer a professional agency to arrange the pre-wedding requirements but here are some guidelines if you want to do it yourself.

Documents that you will need:
1. Birth Certificate
2.Certificate of Singleness/Certificate of No Marriage (CENOMAR)
3.Legal Capacity to Contract Marriage

That’s all.

But of course, the processing is long. You have to get your Birth Certificate from NSO ONLY! No birth certificates from the Local Civil Registrar please! It must be from the NSO. Nowhere else. And it shouldn’t be more than 6 months old. It’s the same with the CENOMAR. They must be all from NSO. After NSO, your documents must go through the DFA office in Manila. Nowhere else. Your document might take some time in this office so be very sure that you have this luxury. I am recommending this to you, and all the others who needed to get their documents authenticated by DFA, please process your documents early and be patient. It could take days so be sure that you have plenty of time to wait. Those who are rushing are more likely to be asked to pay under the table money. Please don’t put yourself in this situation. Stop the red tape! It’s a shameful thing. After getting your documents authenticated by the DFA office, it’s then time to bring these to the Austrian Embassy for further checking. And this is would take several weeks. So again, be sure that your wedding date is not tomorrow otherwise you will be in a very deep ****.

Also take note of the following: The Austrian Embassy in Manila only releases and accepts documents on Fridays. From 1:00pm to 3:00pm only. No other days and no other time. Don’t ask me why, it’s the way it is! After you have your documents from the Austrian Embassy, it’s then time to bring it to a Translator because your documents need to be translated from English to German. We did this final step in Austria because we don’t know anybody in the Philippines who is legally capable to translate such documents.

So that’s all what you’ll need. The required documents for your Austrian partner, is of course another story which I will be covering in my next topic. I hope that this help you somehow. Ciao!

Intercultural Relationships Part 2

Filed under: Before the Wedding, Cultural Differences — Tags: , , , , — Vienna @ 5:46 am

Written on : August 12, 2007

This is now the second part of my rants about intercultural marriage. If you missed the first part, you may want to read it first.

Before I proceed I would like to clarify something because my boyfriend, who is religiously reading what I write here, requested so. I would like to make it clear that all examples I write here doesn’t necessarily refer to us. Like for instance “not showering everyday” (mentioned in the first part). Imagine my boyfriend’s horror when it occurred to him that other people, who read the first part of this article, might be thinking that one of us is not showering everyday. Haha! We do shower everyday. So please note that I am just talking “in general”.

Enough with the clarification and on to the real topic–things to consider before plunging into an intercultural marriage. I have discussed the first two and I will now proceed with the third point.

It depends on the willingness of the couple of meet each other halfway. OK so, you have discussed your upbringing, principles, beliefs, traditions, ect with your partner. Some are completely acceptable and some are acceptable on conditions. So discuss how far you are willing to give or take. A very good example to this is the one we know so well—Asians do send money to back home. They work and send a part of their salary back home. It is expected of them. It would make them feel utterly guilty if they turn their back from this expectation, responsibility, role, or how ever you want to put it. Most westerners on the other hand, don’t do this. If they send money to their parents, their parents might feel embarrassed or offended in contrast to the pride, happiness and thankfulness Asian parents would feel every time they receive money from their children working somewhere. Sending money to parents is way of life to Asians. It has a deep explanation but that deserve another article in another page and I will not go into that now. Going back to my point—if your partner (considering that you are Asian) is not completely ok that you send money back home, what then? Say—you won’t touch his money and send it at home. Say—you just send a part of your very own salary. Say—you just send a particular amount each month or year. Say—you will stop sending money after a few more years or when you get children of your own. Negotiate. Settle. Talk about it until you both agree on one thing and then of course, both must follow whatever you agreed on.

I am sure that there are more things to consider before going into an intercultural marriage. Probe into these then decide. If you are already into an intercultural marriage and you are having problems with your partner, it’s not yet too late. Sit down, talk, and settle. This marriage is special because there is the word “intercultural” but it is just like other marriages, the couple still needs to work on it constantly to make it successful.

If you want to share your experiences, to warn or encourage others, or to comment on this article, you are welcome to do so.

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